Mr. Right is alive and well and living in Egypt.

Unless of course you live in Egypt, in that case Mr. Right lives in Boston. Yes the internet has revolutionized the dating world. Used to be you could only pretend to be someone else for a few months of dating and then your true self would seep though, the mask of romanticism and perfection would slip….revealing a man who would really rather watch football and scratch his balls all night then do something to please you. Why is it that people get so naïve when it comes to meeting people online? Isn’t it just too much of a coincidence that so many men and women who are online every Saturday night like clockwork are also supermodels? Do supermodels really stay home on Saturday night? Is it not also a coincidence that Mr. Right’s webcam is broken? I sort of view the internet as a massive costume party. 14 yr olds become 40 yr olds or even more scary reverse that……fat men suddenly have washboard stomachs, married men are magically single, gas station attendants become executives and executives become submissive slaves in some dominatrix’s chat room. All with the same mission, every single one of these men with the same agenda…..I’m really not much better myself……that all important quest you ask?..........to see boobies. Don’t blame us too much I mean we’re conditioned to worship the breast. It’s our be all and end all….our reason for life!!!!! Think about it. You make the most important connections…the strongest bonds in the first few years of life right? And for those formative years our God is a breast. And to top it off since we’re so small every single one that’s heading for us is the size of a 3 bedroom home. It’s no wonder we’re obsessed with the damn things. For those first couple yrs we spend the majority of our time awake either screaming and crying for it or chewing on it. I’m surprised most grown men don’t walk around with soothers in their mouths. I bet if we did though there’d be less wars. Damn did I get off track!!! I started this rant about fake people online and ended up talking about breasts. How does this always happen to me? I think I need to find my soother!